Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
He slapped my ass and hummed the jello theme song, which was followed by an overly loud "IT'S ALIVE!"
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
my roommate just showed up covered in dirt, drunk....with a whole ice cream cake that says "it's a girl".
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
A girl just asked me if we had pregnancy tests and a coworker had to stop me from telling her I was a pregnancy test. THAT is why I don't drink at work.
He's writing a strongly worded email to Trojan right now
I TOLD YOU THE BARESKIN CONDOMS WEREN'T AS RELIABLE.
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
I dropped a piece of Mac and cheese in the shower and I almost still ate it. Stoned, but not stoned enough to degrade myself.
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
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