Define "chronic" masturbator.
it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
Words i added to my t9 today: gnomes, facebook, and chlamydia.
If you did the rosary as much as you masturbated, you would be the pope
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
I just found a list in your handwriting titled "Places I've Peed." The National Mall and 'under the second bridge after the bend in the road' are two of the tamer entries. I tip my hat.
Who wrote "the chamber of secrets has been open, enemies of the heir beware" across my bathroom wall?
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
Randomize
