Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
She told me at midnight she would blow me harder than a new years party kazoo
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
His rebound girl is half his size, looks like a leprechaun, is majoring in theater studies and has arms like Rosie O'donnell. Do I win?
You call it a hangover, I call it a baby squirrel burrowing its way out of my head.
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
Sam was like the mother fucking Moses of drunk and underage kids and he lead them to safety away from the cops. He's a hero that we deserve.
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
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