omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
I can't believe we just used the phrase "jizz to juice ratio" in casual conversation.
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
You cant carve pumpkins without vodka. It's a Halloween tradition.
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
Randomize
