So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
He had a drawn-on fu manchu and now my vagina has one too.
I spent $31 at mcdonalds last night. Threw my nuggets all over the yard, ate them out of the snow, picked a fight about it, vomited, then passed out.
Naked.
I just realized I'm currently not eating carbs, drinking alcohol or having sex. 2014 is off to a horrible start.
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
Text me some of your sweat
Randomize
