He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
just won a stolen shopping cart in a dance off in a parking lot.
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
I just saw an appointment in my phone called "it's been a month" I think I drunkly did that after I slept with Paul to remind myself to check if I got knocked up... I'm smarter drunk than sober.
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms.
I'm sorry for aggressively singing the Frasier theme song at you so many times last night.
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
So...I was fapping and during it, I got an Amber Alert notification...that's just bad timing.
Randomize
