Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
I wonder how horrible I look to customers. There's cuts all over my face and I can't talk.
What are the cuts from? Head-butting the bathroom light fixture?
Honestly that's best case scenario.
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
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