Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
Kicked off drink for Jesus month by puking in my mouth while talking to my priest...real cool
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
There's nothing like telling your girl to hold your pants while peeing on your neighbors door
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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