You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
i woke up this morning cuddling with a 3 foot statue of Jesus. heaven here i come
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
It's hard to hold down the snapchat button for video while thrusting. Sorry if the cinematography wasn't Oscar-worthy.
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
OH GOOD GOD THE BUFFALO WING SAUCE IS BURNING MY FUCKING CUNT. WHY THE FUCK DID I AGREE TO SPICY AND NOT MILD
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
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