North Korea, Best Korea!
Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
You're like the Mr. T of my A-team, only less gold jewelry and more pitying of fools.
That's the nicest thing anyone has said to me all day.
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
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