they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
woke up naked, gf gone. There is a cup of change in the fridge, a bird in the bathroom, and odie is drawn on my ceiling. I live in a non sequitur
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
We haven't even started dating yet but I already decided I'm going to cheat on her
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
they told me that it was glow in the dark and would make me magical. I was too drunk to say no. I woke up to a purple vagina.
its like a neon Im stupid as fuck sign
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