It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
I'm driving in the middle of nowhere, and I just saw a stuffed Barney hanging from a noose on a tree. Maybe I should turn around.
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
he keeps calling me but I'm too scared to answer... Not sure what he's gonna yell at me for: barging into his room while he was with another girl, filling her shoes with dog food and water, or hiding his keys in the garbage disposal.....
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
She started ignoring us once we told her we were out to celebrate your abortion. Who knew strippers could be judgemental?
i knew it was time to leave the bar when i caught myself doing karate dance moves with a married man.
You were saying you didn't want to go home and insisted that I drop you guys off at your uncles. That's how you ended up sleeping on a porch with two dudes
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
Sorry man, but I'd rather do drugs with strangers than watch sports with you. It's not personal, drugs always beat sports.
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
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