He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
This girl is more easily done than said...
people are starting to question the shark bite story
I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
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