My girlfriend figured out who you are.
I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home.
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
I feel like I just lived out a children's book called "The Day I Went to Law School Stoned"
Were you rubbing your penis on me while I slept? I smell like penis.
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
let’s be honest I’d fucking Irish step dance on your grave, asshole
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
Randomize
