Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
I'm sorry. We set two Christmas trees on fire. Also the neighbor's yard. Also ours.
Thanks for the drunken voicemail of bird calls. Love and miss you, too.
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
Randomize
