I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
Have you ever seen a midget fist pump? BEST. THING. EVERRRRR.
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
I opened my package from my mom today. She put four bottles of tequila in the bottom under my ducky slippers. She knows me way to well.
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
I just did a bump with my mom so I’d sober up for Black Friday shopping
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
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