why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
why is my clorox wipe dispenser full of tortillas?
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
Did I come home in a police car last night? id come downstairs to ask you but i dont think my legs work anymore
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
Randomize
