STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
i just opened a seperate checking account to keep track of how much i make and spend on our keggers
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
Using the balance in my bank account I just calculated how many fifths of vodka I can buy this year. Don't let me buy food, all my money is reserved for alcohol
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.
You were too drunk yesterday to deal with me crying so I am too drunk to deal with logic.
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
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