Say something about gay babies.
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
i said i was sorry for his girlfriend's cancer diagnosis and he said "easy come, easy go" and tried to fuck me
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
He was all like, "I think ur the one that got away and I miss you." I replied, "I gave u a hand job once in your hot tub. No need to wax nostalgic about it."
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
Randomize
