I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
Don't make emojis simulating eating me out
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
I smell Vodka. It's me. If anyone asks it's totally hand sanitizer.
Randomize
