"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
I forgot to tell you. Your neighbor was walking his tiny dog and saw me crawl out of my jeep drunk vomiting and holding onto my bumper. He just said: morning! all friendly.
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
I was chasing disarono with Bacardi and watching ice cube movies. It would have been an epic birthday if I wasn't by myself and actually had some decent friends.. Hint. Asshole.
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
Randomize
