id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
What the fuck am I going to do with a pinata full of tampons?
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
Ok well i was gonna say you can only borrow my fog machine if you will use it to emerge from your room in a cloud of smoke after having sex with sarah, so yeah we're good
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
Because of you I'm damaged goods. I'm a fucking soup can and you dropped me.
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
Randomize
