sitting in my room eating a boneless rib tv dinner, and listening to taylor swift's love story, and i sharted. had to finish the ribs and hear the end of the song before i went to the bathroom to wipe.
Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
Bro, he broke his neck diving into a kiddy pool.
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
Naked. naked and bneed help.
There are leaves in my underwear?
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
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