who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
Our 450 pound cab driver smells like McDonalds and sunblock with a touch of vodka. Correction I smell like vodka.
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
Like will they card me for my own whiskey in shampoo bottles?
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
My mom found your leather pants in our guest room. She doesn't want to know why they are there, she just wants to know if you want them washed.
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
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