just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
Last night I somehow got INCREDIBLY wasted & thought it was a good idea to make a group chat with all the guys I'm hooking up with and just say "bye." soo I'm hiding out till next week.
Why did I wake up to a snap chat of myself drinking beer out of a blender?
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
I feel like I might be the only person I know who eats bundles of radishes in-between orgasms from their vibrator.
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
Randomize
