Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
I just found out the FDA voted to ban Vicodin, my last connection to this world has been destroyed
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
His mom walked into the kitchen smiling, made a scotch on the rocks, hit my bong, and told us goodnight enthusiastically. He's suddenly more appealing to me.
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
Perhaps if I didn't mortify my parents last night with my drunken obnoxious behavior which resulted in the casualty of an entire decorative bathroom shelf which I completely ripped off the wall and left for dead, I would be more than willing to go day drinking.
I feel like if tampons weren't meant to be microwaved, they'd have a warning on the box, so we should be okay...
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
Randomize
