..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
I think my fart just growled at me.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
Randomize