Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
Three words: puerto rican gang bang
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
overheard a conversation between 2 lesbians: 'back when I used to have dick sex...' oh, vegas, I so heart you
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
Whoever put the tambourine in the dryer is a douche. Worst hangover wakeup ever
Come back. She's looking through naked pics of his exes on his phone and questioning him about them and I'm too drunk to walk away.
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
Randomize