Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
If the Four Horseman of the Apocalypse gang banged each other and had a kid, it would look like the creature I woke up next to this morning.
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
Exactly how does jacking off in my purse count as a 'early christmas present'?
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
Drunk me thinks I can light up a cig anywhere, sober me finds this hilarious and highly irresponsible. The grocery store is not a bar.
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
God, I missed his penis.
Oh no. He's definitely text-flirting with me. No straight man over 30 has any other excuse to use so many smiley faces...
Randomize
