i saved all my weight watcher points for this alcohol
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
You planned my entire going away party sitting in the bath tub cradling a bottle of Cuervo. You promised me fire jugglers. And a pinata.
you never texted me what you wanted from the store so I got a piece of chicken and bottle of tequila. if you want anything else you are on your own.
Just saw a hooker eating a pastrami sandwich walking down beach blvd blowing kisses to traffic. My day = made
Can you come pick me up and take me to breakfast then the police station?
Where's your car?
The girl I brought home apparently stole it
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
Randomize
