I swear she didn't look like that last week.
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
Just met me in 10 years...this lady keeps an emergency wine cooler in her bag
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
then he said the sex was mediocre and that it was because of me. and that we could try again tomorrow.
it was 100% mediocre because of him, and we will 100% not be trying again tomorrow.
Randomize
