Tell me I did not drive one hour for whiskey dick.
my "about me" section on Facebook should read "hell-bound alcoholic who wants to fuck a 40-year-old crackhead"
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
He's rescued me passed out naked on the playground next door and I've rescued him passed out naked in the middle of campus. That's why we're a great couple.
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
Just try not to have a boner when you're giving your best man speech, it will really kill the vibe
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
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