Joe is yelling at the trees again.
if i dont get laid while im dressed as Tim Tebow, i'm just staying true to the costume.
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
I just remembered our "im drunk enough to look at your vagina" conversation. Is that offer still valid? I really think I need a second opinion
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
Your cat is quite the conversationalist after some tequila and shrooms
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Our house rule in beer pong, is that if you get the ball in the bitch cup.... you have to snapchat your balls to everyone on your friends list.
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
Randomize
