): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
your brother just told me that Guinness is the first book of the Bible...
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
Change of plans I'm coming home and shotgunning all the beer we have.
I feel like strippers are like dogs, the more you show you're terrified the faster they come at you.
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
Hey. I thought you were saving your 80s playlist til marriage.
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
You tried to prove you weren't drunk by loudly singing the romanian national anthem. Why the fuck do you even KNOW the romanian national anthem?
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