he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
i just heard my neighbor say from outside my window "i don't give a shit what he does, what the hell am i gonna do with my son's penis?"
we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
Every man needs a table where they can sit and reflect on the successful penile conquests of the day.
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
Dude. Went to buy some jack and sailor Jerry, when the guy at the counter realized it was my birthday everybody in the store including the stoners and the elderly sang to me. Then they gave me shots of moonshine. 21st bday was a success
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
I'm not sure why, but my salad smells like a Big Mac. Or maybe that's just the smell of yesterday's, seeping through my skin.
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
please don't ironically join a cult
Randomize
