community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
She said "Lay the fuck down and ill show you how its done. Ill get us both off." I did. And she did. Best words ever said before sex.
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
she broke up with me the week she got divorced. maybe I should grab a beer with her ex
Well I just put wine in my tea
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
Randomize
