whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
I'm sitting next to this guy at the bar. I wrote him a little song in my head it goes "there is no fucking chance you're getting in my pants" gonna sing it to him after he buys me another drink.
Woke up in an unfamiliar basement in a sleeping bag with Matt to a police officer shining his flashlight in my eyes and asking me my birth date and social security number. My morning went swimmingly.
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
And if you put this on Facebook, I will drop live cockroaches in your mouth while you sleep and then smother you with a pillow.
You always say the most romantic things
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
I'm at the back whiskey bar with a 7 and 7 in a winnie the pooh costume. Come find me.
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
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