Do you think an esthetician would be willing to wax the Chanel Cs into my crotch? That way, whenever a guy gets ready to pound on it I can go "Careful, it's Chanel."
Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
Would you please stop exposing your tits on my couch?
Fuck you, my tits are fabulous
Reasons why I love cats more than people: 1. They're not fucking people.
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
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