I swear, if I find out you're lying, I'm going to put your name on one of those herpes watch websites and put the link up on every social networking site in existence.
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
Your dad just texted me? He said I needed to holler at him when I get up tomorrow. I honestly thought you had somehow gone to jail.
I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
The girl who comes up after me always strips to Lana Del Rey. I didn't think working in a strip club could be any more depressing.
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
Randomize
