So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
there is cereal in my wallet where all the cash used to be.
I'm dreading the fact that when the dominoes guy comes, he will ask me if i placed an order under the name "high as shit".
I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
well i had to explain to their mom why the kids i babysit for won't stop repeating the phrase "nice juicy guido"
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
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