I can only masturbate in one position. It's very inconvenient.
dude, i just saw a bobcat while i was rollerblading this morning
1 dont ever text someone @ 8am on sat. 2 dont ever admit to rollerblading past 1992.
My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
apparently while i was high i thought that putting a dinosaur temporary tattoo on my inner thigh would keep me from taking my pants off and having sex with him...
...it didn't...
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
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