Oh fyi, I gave your card to a homeless guy last night and told him you were the world's hottest blonde girl who only likes black men...Sorry
it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
god help us all. i just saw an infant wearing a onesie that said "i don't know who my daddy is"
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
I woke up this morning and the lid to the back of my toilet was missing. Dahfaq do I do with this shit?
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
You know you turned your life around when your drunk eating salad at 3 am on a Friday night
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
Randomize