he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
explain to me why "crisis hotline lolz" is in my contacts?
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
my mom went out and bought me new sheets and redecorated my room. its like she's more excited for me to get laid tomorrow for the first time in two months than I am.
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
Randomize
