No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
She bit a glass in half.
She set fire to my carpet trying to power-dry puke covered cigs with Josh's blowtorch. How she found it in the garage is beyond me but if you bring her with you again I'll shoot you myself.
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
Just checked my voicemails on the work phone on speaker. Thank you so much for the one of you screaming "COME FUCK ME NOWWWW!" my boss loved it ..
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
One of my students submitted a thesis proposal to find the exact correlation between desire for sexual intercourse and vaginal heat.
Tell me you accepted it! This is critical fucking research!
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Randomize
