Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
after you threw up, you tried to prove you were sober by reading the ingredients off the shampoo bottles
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
you came out with your cock in between the legs of a balloon animal. Maybe she'll think you have a sense of humor.
What kind of balloon animal was it?
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
I wish on days I started my period Chipotle would come to my house with a burrito bar ... Then give me a chocolate cake and a large beer.
I just sent Brandon a snapchat where I wasn't wearing a shirt but had a rooster drawn on my boobs that said "cock block" and laughed for 10 minutes I have problems don't judge me
Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
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