Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
I was having the most awesome dream about onion rings and you hit me and told me to stop touching you...WTF?
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
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