If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
He's a Shit stain on my heart
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
I literally have anal toys soaking in the bathroom sink and dinner on the stove. If that doesn't scream "domestic goddess", I don't know what the fuck does.
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
Randomize
