You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
oh my god. my mom just found my pipe. she thought it was a dildo.
like i said, there should be a sitcom about your family.
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
I'm watching the red sox through my neighbors window from my bathroom. We're winning btw.
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
I offered to lick your vagina while wearing a suit... Pretty sure chivalry is well alive.
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
Wait..I'm drunk and butt naked making a pizza. Happy Wednesday.
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
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