So I have to go swallow an entire zebra. Ur on ur own girl.
Dry humping a girl for an hour and then jizzing in your pants doesn't count as losing it.
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
She's allergic to latex.
Lucky bastard.
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
Um, you were throwing up the shocker symbol in front of all of the wedding guests during the best man's speech. No wonder the groom thinks we're bad
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
Stop calling my penis "Fat Jesus"
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
Randomize
