We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
Yet again my drunken self has managed to find his way into the middle of nowhere with no shoes or recollection of what happened last night.
Then I guess you don't remember me driving you there after you tried making out with my girlfriend, dipshit.
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
Randomize